Having an overflow of engagements, weddings and soon to be parents ain’t new. It’s seems all year long the people of my TL have been feeling the love. Now that it’s the holidays the singles’ blues has been amplified. I am forever seeing them reshare videos of a girl that’s getting proposed to in front of the world’s tallest tree and Santa himself with the caption “must be nice”.  Fun fact: I’ve been single for the most Christmases of my life. Maybe that’s why being solo on the holidays doesn’t bother me, but seeing melodramatic comments from singles does. Here are some things that I hope lifts your spirits and brings you a merry Christmas.

Hang With Your Single Friends

Since it’s the holiday season you might not want to hang with your booed up or babied up friends, because all of their attention will already be tied up. But your single friends, yall in the same boat to row together. You might not kiss and hug under the mistletoe (unless yall those sitatuation type of friends… stop that before 2017), but you can pretty much do everything couples have fun doing. Have some laughs while shopping and looking for the perfect gifts. Attend some Christmas parties together or throw one yourselves. Although it seems like everyone is popping out a baby or getting married surprising all of my close friends are neither so we always have a good time being out and enjoy each other’s company.

Offer a Helping Hand

Christmas time is a time where there is a plethora of places to lend a helping hand. I find that when you are busy actually having a life being single doesn’t really bother you as much. You can pick up a temporary part-time job at a retail store to keep you busy and earning money. You can put your creative gifts to use and volunteer at a local Christmas play or music fest. You can also help those less fortunate by serving at a soap kitchen or bell ring for the salvation army. You can even start your own opportunity of good will if you notice the lack of something in your neighborhood. One year I started a coat drive and this year I have been donating old and unwanted clothes and my stuffed animal collection. Who knows, you might find that the only reason why you have hated being single this whole time is being you’re bored and thought you could only do cool things if you had a baby on your hip or a man on your arm.

Get Close To Family

I’ve never gone a Christmas without my family and to be honest I often feel a little nervous when I think about me meeting my future husband and him asking me to spend Christmas with his family instead of mine. Besides Jesus, family is a big source of what makes Christmas feel like Christmas to me. I love keeping up family traditions like playing music while we trim the tree. I love going Christmas shopping with my grandparents and horribly wrapping gifts with my Grandpa. I even love trying new traditions; this year I plan to introduce my family to jollof rice. Being with my family for Christmas is easy for me, because I have a big family and I live at home, but for those of you who might be a little far of from your family I suggest that you buy that plane ticket or fill up your tank and be around your loved ones for Christmas. I know that I have yet to experience the love that God will show me through my future husband, but being around my family I can still feel unconditional love and warmth and that’s a blessing.

Go On Vacation

If all else doesn’t work get away. Yes, you can take a single vacation on Christmas. All of your friends might be busy, volunteering might not work for you and maybe you have a small or no family at all. Then shake things up and do something different. I know us American’s don’t think about it much, but the whole world won’t be celebrating Christmas on December 25th. There are some places in the world that are sunny and snow free and Christmas tree free. You can head out there, see the world, get clarity and maybe a massage. So head to Vegas or hop on a cruise. There are even some organized singles trips that you can take. Don’t look at it as being a Grinch or Scrooge. I’m not advising that you become all ba humbug, but it can be more of a trying something different and an exciting type of thing. You might not have the baby or the mate, but you’ll get a once in a lifetime experience. Who knows maybe being on your Eat, Pray, Love type of stuff you might accidentally end up meeting Mr. Right.

Don’t feel embarrassed or left out when it comes to being single during any season. I remember the first Christmas I had a little boyfriend (it was Jr. High) and it was awful, because he called me crying, because his brother had him under the impression that I was flirting with him (I wasn’t). I spent hours hiding out from my family on the phone in the bathroom trying to calm him down until he fell asleep on the phone. That was one of the worst Christmas ever. I say that to say, focus on YOUR season not THE season. I would love to have a man to trim the tree with and wear ugly sweaters, but I am aware that December 16′ isn’t the right time for it. You can be single at Christmas and have an amazing time. Don’t compare yourself to others and have a very merry Christmas.


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